Wednesday, 25 June 2014

100th Post, 2 Birthdays, 1 trip and a broken car

It's true! 100 posts! none contain anything remotely useful/interesting/relevant in the real world, but I have had a blast! So Big Squeezies, Kisses and Thank You to you all for reading my nonsense! I was 45 on Monday, Missy was 13 on Tuesday............and the car really is broken. There's always drama here dahlinks.



As I am now older it means I see nothing wrong with this at all
My 'do I care?' brain cells have reduced dramatically with age,
it's chemical name is 'Dontcarium' it's a transition cell which eventually morph's into the Noble 'Blissium'




Mr F commented my blog is a series of images with a load of swear words,
how f***ing rude!





I know myself well enough, I know I am immune to literary genius,
I prefer this


I took this into work once, I ended up reading someone else's magazine instead,
I have been exposed to some seriously dodgy stuff as a result,
the journalism alone is appalling!



I am not endorsing these brands of chocolate
I'm just being fancy



Eldest does not want to be known as 'Eldest' anymore as it's 'boring'
I wouldn't agree to her suggestion of 'Sassy Beesh'
we finally agreed to Sassy B 



Sassy B has discovered the awesome power of pom-poms
her sewing skills are infinitely better than mine 
she's off to Aya Napa in a few weeks



Missy has left today to go on her school trip


Ma baybee is 13


Before the party

things I have learned from throwing a child's birthday party
1. toddlers don't eat food, they get red-faced, drink a lot and run everywhere (you must also ask 'do you need a wee?' a lot)
2. bouncy castles are very good as long as you don't invite the whole class
3. teenagers will eat everything you have, keep eating and then clog your toilets
4. when they are much older and are drinking alcohol, fool them into having fancy cocktails which are heavily diluted and a neon colour, also make regular checks on bedrooms (which I did, like a ninja) 
5.  beware of the twerking elderly, they may also use a doorframe to dance in an erotic manner


For all celebrations in our house, we are all together
in the morning we all greet the special person like zombies,
Sassy B was in work at 7am and had to miss the tradition
but left this
also with an accompanying note, a line from it reads,
'To be read with a scouse accent..............if my weave is with you then technically I am half there'
ahhhhhhhh



Finished room with shelves up and voile curtains, new bedding and a rug 

I am destroyed
ha!

My sewing machine is being fixed today
I am following the wise advice from Em,
I got a quote from the most relaxing man in the entire world
as he was talking, I was in a most transcendental manner
he's back today to repair it
I expect to fall asleep mid-sentence 
*******************

I hope you are all blooming marvellous! 
see you soon you gorgeous lot

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Friday, 20 June 2014

Sit down and take the weight of your fabulous shoes


It is the weekend!!........I do like the weekend, well for me Saturday (I work Sunday) or Saturend, Weekerday? ahhh who cares, it's one day in the week when I can have a lie in.  In another life I do believe I was a Sloth.  I can out sleep a toddler.

I was going to write something thought provoking and intelligent.  Then I remembered I never do.



I know
....aren't they fabulous?














I am sharing with Sacramento share in style GOLD
Me and Frank



A wise insect once bit me
it taught me a very valuable lesson




and I'm in the mood for a dance

Tina Turner - Proud Mary


Donna Summer - I feel love


HAVE A WONDERFUL WEEKEND
OH YEAH!!!!!!!!!

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Wednesday, 18 June 2014

An insect stopped me in my tracks

Hey y'all!
Sorry I have been off the radar.................again.  Seriously, I am the worst Blogger ever.
Mr F and I have been working flat out.

Missy is 13 next week, which means we will have a little party. I am working to a deadline, everything has to be nice, tidy and clean. 
This happens 3 times a year for the kids birthdays, I suddenly do things like 'fridge management' and clean like I am supposed to.  

This is how tidy I want it


 Reality





At the moment I have just 2 tidy rooms
things have been re-organised
almost every room has had something done/attacked/painted



Laying the the floor
I have come to the conclusion there are 3 stages to domestic DIY in our house

1.    Bicker – it goes like this – this piece doesn’t fit – it does –it doesn’t…..ok, you do it then – give us a hand – no, you said you could do it, so do it  – stop being childish – I’m not being childish (I cross my arms and pout)

1.    Be Competitive – I’m working harder than you, I’m laying the floor – I’m cutting the pieces, I measure everything – but I’m laying the floor (I ignore the fact we are both working together as I am laying the floor with my super floor laying skills, which means I am working harder as I am a floor laying genius)

           Double entendre’s and general filth – give me some wood – that’s as far as it will go in – make sure it goes in there, no! not there – it doesn’t fit – come on, bang it in 







 1 trip to the local Walk in NHS
I have a mangey insect bite
I'm on anti-biotics the size of anal pessary's
if it tracks I have to go to A&E
I don't have time for this

My Eldest insisted I sat down 
I now have time for visiting blogs
So, every cloud does has a silver lining

No-one likes my hat
Like I care hahahha


In 9 days
all will be back to normal
I can't wait


In the meantime
this is my face


and this is what I have discovered


Apologies in advance for my inconsistency in everything

and thank you for your most lovely comments on my last post

See you all soon 

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Friday, 13 June 2014

I got the Shrug Bug

It's Friday! Yes! I hope you are all having a wonderful one!

I'm joining in with Anne, its the 60's pick me up! I'm missing my link in's with all of this being busy nonsense, my answer is 'Make Time', so I did.

Now, I don't own anything 60's
but I do have fake hair and a white dress

 Priscilla
(*weep* she's so gorgeous)


and Raquel
(seriously! one hot woman!)
are my 60's inspiration

I do realise I am not their triplet hahahaha!


I know
50's glasses


Shrug Bug!
Vix and Krista's shrugs, fabulous! and Sue's too! awesome shruggage going on!
I had a go with my 'I didn't realise how extraordinarily large this scarf was and had to make several adjustments, as seen by my dreadful sewing' scarf
I adore it!




Dodgy Beehive
my hair is flammable








In honour of  Big Hair and Magnificent Voices
The Ronnette's 'Be my baby'


Dusty Springfield
'Son of a Preacher Man'



Have a Magnificent Weekend!!!
Thank you for all of your awesome comments on my last post
my shrug, hair and me adore you!

see you next week you gorgeous bunch!

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Tuesday, 10 June 2014

Never mind the Pollocks



I don't like decorating.
I look like a Jackson Pollock.

I managed to get gloss paint on my bra, my boob glued itself to the bra, I didn't feel it, a few hours later I had to peel the bra from my breast, I won't do that again.  As I am in work tonight, I will need to soak myself in turps/white spirits to get my 'Pollock' inspired paint work off, which is a shame, I'm rather fond of the paint splattered look.  I look very, very art-y.



I also created a bunny shelter for the rain,
I didn't anticipate the wind would blow it away,
it's now at the bottom of the garden and looks like an ornament



A lovely door underneath the chipboard


Missy wants a minimalist feel to her bedroom
minimalist?


Gratuitous Cookie pic



Missy's furniture has been re-located and re-painted
the drawers made by my late Father-in-Law


Still a lot of work to do
a new desk area, swivel chair, shelving etc
we are laying the floor this weekend
bugger
I forgot, I hate decorating and laying floors
I was chuffed with the wallpaper, Mr F says it's the wrong pattern
It's meant to look like a Manhattan Skyline
Fuck





How do I make bedroom furniture look like dining room furniture?
add plates and stuff


Their clothes are still in there
that's my little problem with minimalism
where does stuff go?


Decorating messes with your nails


Missy doesn't want this anymore either
it doesn't go with her vision
which means I got the dressing table
*I am very, very, very happy*


It has taken a day and a half to get the house back to normal
I have 2 more doors to paint
I managed to paint myself into the bathroom
(it's a sliding door)
Mr F had to get me out




But I have finished my painting for today
I have done all my work
I can now relax with a flaming huge coffee and visit you all
I do miss you

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